YEAR: 1993

HARDWARE: Motorola 68000 CPU

DEVELOPER: Tiertex Design Studios

PUBLISHER: US Gold

See that logo at the top of the cover? That logo says "U.S. Gold." That means this game isn't an official Capcom sequel...knowing that, the rest of us can breathe easier and sleep more soundly at night. This game deserves all the flaming garbage tossed its way, because it is entirely unworthy to bear the name "Strider."

How did U.S. Gold acquire the rights to make a Strider game, you may ask. Simple. They produced the Amiga/C64/DOS versions of the game...and their contract left them with partial control over the Strider trademark. In short, they could produce another Strider game, but they couldn't use Hiryu.

So, instead of Hiryu, you play as Hinjo, the candy-assed Strider who talks like a surfer. No lie. That game manual is the stuff of legend, and should be read through at least once...for humor's sake. "Rock on, Strider dude!" indeed.

Hinjo may not be as cool as Hiryu, but he does have some rather...interesting abilities. For one, he can toss shuriken, if he happens to have some on him. For another, he can choose to use a sweep cypher instead of Falchion (which doesn't look nearly as cool). Also, he's equipped with a blaster pistol and the ability to transform into a kind of weird gear-thing...but it's difficult to control, and actually pulling off the transformation is iffy. The game sometimes triggers the transformation on its own.

The level design in this game is absolutely horrid. It's far too linear, something that the original Strider was not. The levels in the arcade Strider followed every path but a straight line.

There are no robot helpers, either. Apparently Hinjo is too cool to have a robot panther. He should have a surfboard familiar, though, to make up for his lack of helpers.

Instead of a "hero-defeats-mad-god, saves-world" plot, Strider Returns has a very Super Mario Bros. plot: Hinjo has to save his girlfriend, Lexia, from Meio, who's kidnapped her as part of a revenge conspiracy. Revenge? On who? Hinjo? Hiryu kicked Meio's ass, not Hinjo. Gives you an indication of how much R&D time was spent on this game, doesn't it?

I've heard that the Master System/Game Gear version of this game has vastly improved control and programming. If you absolutely must play this game, I recommend that you get the SMS/GG version. Avoid the Genesis version like the plague.