You are all sick, sad people. I go to all the trouble of re-designing several sections of this site, re-doing some graphics, hunting down screenshots and cover art, and all I ask from you is that you simply tell me who you'd like to play the main roles if they were ever going to do a Strider movie. I even found a Cannon Dancer fansite for you people, and an excellent fanart of Kirin. Guess how many emails I got? Two. I feel so neglected. I'm so disappointed, in fact, that I considered scrapping this update altogether. But then, I remembered something. I remembered that I'm not doing this for any of you. I'm doing it for this girl right here. I don't know who she is, but I'm going to marry her someday . . . . .

Eh, what's that? What did he just say? "Cannon Dancer fansite"? "Kirin fanart"? Don't doubt your ears, people; you heard right. I did, in fact, find those very things. I'd wager that the people working on Body Weapon would love to see them, too. Maybe later. First, we're going to do the movie thing.

Let's get started. Thomas Leenders wrote in and voted for the following actors and actresses:

Hiryu - Marc Dacascus
Sai Poo - Anita Mui
Nam Poo - Maggie Cheung
Tong Poo - Michelle Yeoh
Hien - Brandon Lee. Failing that, Ray Parks.
Meio - Christopher Walken

Good, solid picks. Marc Dacascus has great martial arts skills, the Kuniangs are well chosen, and damn, I'd love to see Ray Parks using a double-ended cypher. Christopher Walken just freaks me out, though...I dunno what it is about him (that Fatboy Slim video, maybe), but I always think he's made of wax.

Rob Strangman chose these:

Hiryu - Jet Li
General Mikiel - Michael Byrne
Solo - Temeura Morrison (Jango Fett)
The Kuniangs - "I have no idea."
Strobaya - Dolph Lundgren
Captain Beard - Matthew McConaughey
Ouroboros, Mecha Pon, Lago, etc. - combination of CGI and models
Meio - Ian McDiarmid

Again, good choices. I personally think it would be impossible for the mecha-bosses to be portrayed by anything but CGI and models, but okay. Temeura Morrison is an excellent choice for Solo...almost makes me want to change my pick. Almost. Jet Li's also an interesting choice as Hiryu, but I personally think my pick is better...naturally.

Here's my picks:

Hiryu - Jason Scott Lee
Sheena - Jennifer Connelly
Kain - Paul Walker
Ryuzaki - Chow Yun-Fat
Strobaya - Dolph Lundgren
Solo - Wesley Snipes
Sai Poo - Anita Mui
Nam Poo - Kari Wuhrer
Tong Poo - Michelle Yeoh
Hien - Robin Shou
Matic - Viggo Mortensen
Meio - Malcolm McDowell

Put a mask and a gi on Jason Scott Lee and he is Hiryu. He's got the credentials, too: he played Bruce Lee in Dragon, the biopic of Lee's life. Robin Shou played Liu Kang in Mortal Kombat, so he'd make a great Hien. If for some reason Jason Scott Lee opted not to play Hiryu, Shou would make a good Hiryu, too. Jennifer Connelly...well, she's a bit iffy, but I've always had a crush on her and I thought she was great in Dark City, so I figure she can handle it. Chow Yun-Fat could definitely pull off the "mentor Strider" mode needed for Ryuzaki: go watch Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon if you doubt me.

Strobaya's role called for a musclebound blonde idiot with a thick accent, so I figured that Dolph Lundgren would be perfect for the role. He's even got experience at portraying Russians! As for Solo, for some reason I always thought of him as being black...and Wesley Snipes was good in Demolition Man and the Blade movies, not to mention the airtime he caught in Terminal Velocity so why not? As for the Kuniangs, I think the only one I'll really need to explain is Nam Poo...I picked Kari Wuhrer because I always think of Nam Poo as being older, sexier, and more seductive than the other two (Ever notice how the Power Puff Girls and the Kuniangs have similar roles? You've got Sai Poo/Bubbles, Tong Poo/Buttercup, and Nam Poo/Blossom. Heck, the pair-ups even wear the same color clothing! Anyway...), and Ms. Wuhrer is definitely all of those things.

That leaves us with the two really bad guys: Matic and Meio. Now, most of you may know of Viggo Mortensen as the guy who played Aragorn/Strider in The Lord of the Rings...but the guy is a very versatile actor. He's even portrayed the devil incarnate, in one of his roles. It was a spine-tingling performance, too. Truly. I think that, given his considerable acting talents and fighting prowess...he could definitely pull off the Matic role. As for Meio...well, this one's difficult. Obviously we couldn't cast Mikhail Gorbachev in the role, though many of us would do it just for laughs. I figure that Malcolm McDowell would make a great Meio. He's a great actor with a very resonant, recognizable voice...I'm positive that he could pull off Meio's laugh with ease.

. . . at this point, I would ask for feedback, but since I've already done that, what's the point? Ah well. I'm having fun with my site, that's for sure. HTML's a beautiful thing. Anyway, until next week...enjoy the updates, and I'll see you around.

Say what? What's that? You want to see the Kirin fanart? Oh hell, why not?